Friday, October 13, 2006

Ten Dating Tips That every guy should know



by Amos
Preface
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Get prepared for the date.
It's amazing how often this step is overlooked. While appearance isn't everything, cleaning yourself up before going out goes a long way. The saying goes - “You can't change the genes in you, but you can change the jeans your in.” and it's absolutely true. Wearing a nice clean shirt, some neat pressed pants, and an up-to-date pair of underwear makes the impression that you are able to take care of yourself and also reflects good hygiene. While this might seem like common knowledge, it's overlooked often enough to earn it's place on our dating tips list.

Keep busy before your date.
Idle minds have time to over-think and over-complicate the situation. Don't dedicate the entire day to waiting for your date to happen, you're a busy person with lots of things to do – and if you don't have anything to do – find something! We've created a checklist of things you could be doing on our site. Your time is important, you're important – which brings us to the next tip.

Never seem too available.
Desperation is the king of date killers. You need to keep the mindset that you are an important busy person that your date is lucky to know. While you can have a mutual respect for your date (even without knowing them intimately) you are taking time from your busy schedule to give her a chance. By always being available, never hanging up the phone first, or constantly calling your date – you're almost guaranteeing you won't have a second date.
Recharge your batteries.
Dating can be tiring, especially when managing multiple dates with different women. If you feel like taking a night off – a weekend off – a week off go ahead and do it. Your dates will understand that you're busy or have personal matters to attend to and they will be there when you're ready to share your time with them. If they request that you have a drink with them on Friday night, just let them know that you'd like to but can't make it this Friday – it's that simple. You're not required to share with them why you can't make it, but it's suggested that you schedule another time you're available to talk or go out. By taking some time off you can be in top condition both mentally and physically.

Drop the comparisons between new and old dates.
Phrases like “Jennifer is cute, but not as cute as Sarah – the girl I met last week” are sabotaging your relationship with Jennifer. Compare dating to playing the lottery, the more you play – the better your chances of winning. Whether you define winning as forming a long and exclusive relationship or just getting your date into bed you have a much better chance if you play the odds. If your date is attractive and intelligent enough to date in the first place, she's already met your qualifications – why further limit your options?

Be prepared for a fresh take on dating.
Let's face it, technology plays a big part in our lives whether you notice it or not. If you've been out of the dating loop for several years or haven't really ever been in the loop you need to learn to use technology to your advantage in the world of dating. Fortunately we're not just talking about microwave ovens and longer lasting light bulbs here – we're talking about communication mediums. Text messages, emails, instant messages – these are all forms of communication that modern people use and can use for dating. While the traditional “Hey baby, what's your number?” is still alive and kicking, it's often easier to get positive response if you're asking for something less personal such as an email or IM name. You may find that fairly often they write down their phone number just in case you can't get in touch with them on line anyway. Aside from communication methods, the Internet provides for an interesting new medium of meeting people. The “Online Dating Craze” has started to become acceptable and extremely effective in matching hot dates. Click here for a list of just some of the “new” ways you can meet people.

Remember what dating is.
Dating is the meeting and communication of two people, which means in layman's terms you need to learn a little about your date through conversation. Conversation can not function if it is one-sided. Consider this, your conversations with your dates are structures – just like buildings. One of the strongest shaped buildings in existence are pyramids because of their triangle shaped sides. In comparison, the triangle conversation is one that includes three sides; My side, Your side, and Our side. Talk about yourself and allow them to listen, allow them to talk about themselves and you listen, and talk about each other and listen. Show interest in talking, listening, and sharing –and you can't go wrong.

Show some class that isn't low.
Be confident, but courteous. There is nothing wrong with opening a door or pulling out a chair. Show some respect for your date while showing respect for yourself. If you drink, do it in moderation – if you smoke, do it in moderation. Leave the beer chugging pizza pounding gorilla at home or with your buddies at the tailgate party - not all women appreciate class, just the one's worth a damn. In case you were wondering, nothing screams “Don't Date Me!” like cheesy pick-up lines – leave those at home too. Not every lottery ticket is a winner.m This is a fact that you've accepted to be true. The same with dating, not every date / approach / conversation / pick up attempt is going to be successful. Cope with this fact and move on. Numbers game, remember?

Confidence is key.
This is possibly the most important thing to remember – not just in dating; but in life. Being confident in your ability to do something is what sets you apart from the slack jawed gawker pinned to the wall unable to converse with anyone in the crowd. To put it bluntly, people are only capable of respecting those who seem confident in their decisions and actions – even if they are the wrong actions. Being confident is a difficult concept to grasp though, and can require much practice to fully master

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